Habits, good and bad play a big part in our success, both in the workplace and our personal lives. Positive habits can contribute to success and life satisfaction, while negative habits can do the opposite and cause us major frustration as we struggle to control them. This article provides some tips on breaking habits by taking a "one day at a time approach."

If you are like most people and honest with yourself you could probably complete the following sentence; " I have this habit of _________ that I'd really like to manage!". If you can't complete that one, here's another I'm certain you'll have more luck with; "He/she (you choose the person) has this annoying habit of_____________ that really bothers me!" Most of us at one time or another have realized that we have habits that are holding us back in some aspect of our lives. All of us know someone who has a habit they should work on. At the same time, if you've tackled smoking habits, eating habits, or interpersonal habits, then you realize how very difficult it can be to change a deeply rooted habit. But we also know that, with perseverance, we can succeed. As critical a role as perseverance plays, it also helps if we know a little about the science of breaking habits. And that's the focus of this article; a little advice about breaking habits.

One Day at a Time:
There is a well documented change experience known as quantum change. When one undergoes quantum change, it takes the form of an instant transition; one in which some of your deeply held values, beliefs and habits change almost on the spot. It's sometimes described as a born-again experience. Unfortunately, it's very unlikely you will undergo such as experience while trying to battle an irritating habit. Like most of us, you will struggle through a fairly long drawn out process (thus the need for perseverance). We call this process (the opposite of quantum change) the "one day at a time approach". The following are some useful guidelines that will help you through such a process:

1. Take a week before you start: Most people can put a label on the habit they want to change. They can tell you they want to become more assertive, less aggressive, or calmer. However, if this is as far as you get with your definition, nothing will change. Take a week to translate your habit into specific behaviours and contexts. In other words, if you want to become more assertive, identify exactly what behaviour you want to change, in which situations do you most want to change, who is involved. You may be surprised. Many people, when they do this, find that the behaviour changes simply because of the increased awareness.
2. Ensure Feedback and Social Support: The role that others around you play will be vitally important to your success. If you are changing an aspect of your interpersonal behaviour you may want someone to tell you how you're doing from an objective point of view. Also, it sometimes requires courage, but it can help if others know what you are trying to change. Support from those around you can provide a tremendous boost.
3. Use a Log or Diary: During the first week, and continuing through the habit breaking process, it really helps if you have a diary to record your progress at the end of every day. Record your successes. Record temptations, lapses and reasons for them. Use your diary as a learning tool to fine tune your strategy as you learn more about the behaviours you are changing.
4. At the Beginning of Every Day: Plan your day. Look at the day ahead and anticipate opportunities to display your new behaviour. Also anticipate and prepare for situations in which you'll be prone to lapse.
5. Throughout Every Day: Be aware of the situations in which you have succeeded in exhibiting the new behaviours. Also note near lapses and lapses; why you think they happen, and how you will deal with them next time.
6. At the End of Every Day: Summarize in your log the day's activities, your successes, and what you have learned from the day's experience.
7. The Best Part: Reward yourself for success. At the end of the day, a moment of self-congratulations; at the end of a successful week, treat yourself to something you want and deserve. But use reward carefully; no success, no reward.

Many find this process to be too much trouble. We've already mentioned perseverance as a prerequisite to breaking habits. However there is another prerequisite just as important, and it's motivation. Far more change initiatives fail because of lack of motivation than lack of skill. If you aren't really motivated to change, then nothing will work. Of course you could wait and hope that you'll be lucky enough to experience quantum change.

For more information contact Bob Power